✨

for dette 🩷

✦ a little corner of the internet just for you ✦

★ ✿ ★ ✿ ★ ✿ ★

[ welcome, Maria Lourdes ]

Read this once you arrived sa Manila:

Dear fren,

As you venture into the concrete wilderness of Manila, make sure to initiate conversations with pretty strangers there and who knows, maybe you'll find your true love there. (Charot!) I wish you safety, peace, and focus sa imong pag-eskwela diha. Hopefully, gibasa ni nimo pag-abot jud nimo sa Manila. Pero kung wala, aw not following instructions jud ka, haha!

To be honest, I forgot the exact reason why we became friends in the first place (kuyawa, na-move sa laing topic.) Bitaw, I think it was back in Grade 8 during our K-pop phase. You were just so easy to approach; I didn't feel an ounce of intimidation or shyness when talking to you. That's why my core memory of you is that you've always been this chill girl who gets along with everyone from girls to boys. I felt like I could easily talk to you then, and of course, still now. Pero muhawa naman ka sa Mambaling, snaol... ako napud sunod hahahhaha!

Bitaw, I wish you well in all your future decisions. I know that even if it's morally questionable ( hahahha), you will still make the right choice. Not just because I trust you, but because I know you trust yourself — and you always own up to the consequences of your actions (cuz i know so many peopl who cannot woman up their actions) I truly respect that about you, and I'm just so proud to be your friend.

I hope you keep that exact humor and personality when we meet again. I am very intentional and attentive about who I keep close in my network, and I'm glad you're in it.

This is actually my first time creating and writing a website for personal use, hahahha! Gidalian ni, but I hope you'll enjoy reading this. I also put some pictures here. While scrolling through our Messenger history, nakaingon jud kog, "Wow, gamaya ra diay natog pictures sa?" Hahahhahahhaha.

But you know what? I'm quite surprised by how unchangeable you are in the best way. I've known a lot of people who made drastic changes for the worse. Of course you changed, because we all grew up, but the core of who you are is still the exact same Odette I've always known. That's why I never feel an ounce of hesitation or awkwardness whenever we talk, whether online or offline.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy reading these. Small notes ra man unta ni, pero mas laysho man paminawon ang word nga 'letters' gud, hahahha!

♡ ♡ ♡

— Gwen 🩷

[ our pics together hehe ]

gamaya ra diay ta og pictures hahaha but here they are 🩷

pacute era ni maria 🩷

maria hancock

May 2026 maria selfie stolen in Jai alai Gaisano 😭

okie pata diring dapita mamsh? haha

ESL teachers era in 2023 💅

serving face card in our teenage years 😌

Ms. Pharmacist 💊

LMAOOO 😂

Maria in sad mode 😿

ahahha kapoy kaayu mamsh 😭

Maria in like mode 👍

Maria in peace mode ✌️

✉️ Letters for you my fren

click the one that matches your mood rn 🩷

[ more dette moments ]

serving looks

That was my first time witnissing the birth of a pageant queen 😳

familiar ang background hahah

non-nonchalant era hahaha

💌

open when: feeling nervous

Gurl, nervous ka? Wako kabaw nga 2 words, Odette ug gikulbaan, are two same words. Hahahaha.

BUT let me Teacher Gwen help you spell that nervousness away. Based sa akong research, ang pinakaepektibo nga paagi para maconquer ang kulba is to master your breathing.

✨ The 4-7-8 Breathing Technique

1

Exhale completely sa imong baba.

2

Close your mouth ug breath sa ilong for 4 seconds.

3

Hold your breath for 7 seconds. Weird feeling, normal na.

4

Exhale completely sa baba for 8 seconds.

5

Repeat 3 to 4 times.

🔬 Why it works: Ang slow exhale activates your parasympathetic nervous system. Basically gisultihan nimo ang imong brain nga "wala ta namatay, relax." Mo decrease ang heart rate nimo og ang cortisol. It's your body's built-in reset button.

— Gwen 🩷

⚡

open when: need energy

Gurl, you have to get up and work your ass off - ay, study diay. Hahahaha.

But first: drink water. Basig dehydrated ra ka mao ng wala kay energy. Or eat food. Sometimes the most "complex" problems have the most embarrassing solutions and the answer is literally just gi gutom lang jud ka.

          💡 Okay now for the real tip: if you want to feel energized in 5 seconds flat, just picture me in your head. I know. I know. I look so pretty, beautiful, cute and graceful and pretty and cute, and pretty hahah but trust me, you will feel refresh and energized immediately. You're welcome. That's my gift to you. serving face as usual from cebu to manila hahahahha!
        

Pero btaw. Water, food, move your body a little, and then get back to it. You didn't move to Manila to lie down, right?? (Okay sometimes lying down is valid but not rn, get your ass up.) 🩷

— Gwen 🩷

🥹

open when: you miss me haha

Wow, himala! Hahahaha.

Bitaw, if ako si Odette mingawon pud ko sakong self uie ( hehe I'm just built that way 😏) But seriously, if you don't miss me at all after reading this... then mao ng gi-ingon: dili ta tru fren. Hahahaha I'm joking. (hmmm am I?)

          hahaha btaw, you can just send me a message on Messenger anytime mamsh and literally just say "I miss you Gwen mwa mwa mwa" and I will reply. Dayun. I promise.
        

(Terms and conditions: valid only if I'm awake. Wag kang mag-send og 3am tas magalit ka kung di ko makita agad hahahaha.)

But yes. I miss you too. yieeee

— Gwen 🩷

🌧️

open when: you are feeling down

Hey. I know Manila can feel heavy sometimes especially on the days when nothing is technically wrong but everything still feels off.

I actually felt something similar katong naa ko sa Egypt. Pero the difference was, tinuod jud nga anxious ko ato hahaha nay actual off sa sitwasyon nako there. Fortunately, you don't have that same situation, so that's already something. 🩷 But yeah — those kinds of days, the ones without a clear reason, are actually the hardest because you can't even explain it to yourself.

You don't have to be okay right now. You're allowed to just sit with it for a bit. Maybe watch your favorite movie, or eat something that makes you feel normal again. Basig ice cream mamsh — try. Kay sugar is _____? Unsay answer, Ms. Pharmacist? Hahahaha. (I'll let you fill that in yourself.)

          Feeling down doesn't mean you're failing. It doesn't mean you made the wrong choice about something, or anything at all. It doesn't mean something bad is bound to happen. Actually, I think fate works the opposite way kay if you feel down right now, maybe something nice is on its way to you later.
        

It just means you're human. And we humans will feel a lot of things even things we don't fully understand ourselves. That's not weakness. That's just being alive.

Drink something warm. Rest if you need to. And when you're ready, not when you force yourself, but when you're actually ready. You'll get back up. Kaya na nimo, fren. Ikaw pa?! Naa rako diri kung kinahanglan ka og someone to talk to. (and naa pud imong fam, imo motherdear and siz and kuyaz) We might help lessen that downess a lil bit.🩷 (or talk pud saimo papadear basin gimingaw nato nimo)

— Gwen 🩷

🤔

open when: in doubt

Hmm. Doubting yourself again?

Okay, I get it. Actually, I get it more than you think. Si Ms. Doubt sigeg visit sa akong brain nowadays, I don't even the reason of the frequent visits. But enough about me, this letter is for you.

First thing I want you to do: ask yourself why you're doubting yourself. Not to spiral, but to actually locate it. Because sometimes si Ms. Doubt mag-appear every time may something specific nga nag-agitate sa iya (cuz if there's trigger, naa nay reason and its up to you to locate the source, agent maria 😎🔫) Once you know asa gikan, mas dali siyang i-address.

And when you answer that... second question is: what's your name?

          Sounds silly pero hear me out. Personally, I boost myself up just by saying my own name. "Lezgow Gwennaya, kaya ra na nimo, ikaw pa." Try it with yours. "Dette, kaya ra ni nimo." Say it out loud. In the mirror if you're feeling extra. Shout it if you want. Kay affirming does wonders and scientist and physicist are still studying the powers behind it. anyway ni digress nako hsha.
        

🔬 Research-backed ways to get out of the doubt spiral:

1

Name it, don't fight it. Studies show that labeling an emotion ("I feel doubt") reduces its intensity.

2

Ask: is this doubt based on evidence or just fear? Real problems need real solutions. But a lot of doubt is just fear wearing a logic costume.

3

Do one small thing anyway. Action is the fastest cure for doubt. You don't need to feel confident first, confidence usually comes after you do the thing, not before.

4

Talk to yourself like you'd talk to me. Would you tell me I can't do something just because I'm scared? No. So don't do it to yourself either.

Maybe there are situations where doubt is actually healthy because Doubt is just your brain doing a quality check. The problem only starts when you let it talk you out of things you actually want and deserve. Try the steps. See if it works. And if it doesn't work today, try again tomorrow kay it might work diay ahah🩷

— Gwen 🩷

🧭

open when: feeling lost

Gurl, I get it. I feel lost every time I start something new, or when a decision I just bet on has a completely different reaction than I anticipated. And of course kung nag-lakaw ka sa bag-ong dalan, mawagtang man jud ka. That's just what happens. That's what's happening to you right now, and it makes total sense.

          If I could give you one piece of advice: you don't need to have everything figured out right now. You just need to take the next small step. One decision, one day, one thing. That's it.
        

Give yourself grace, dette. Not everything can be solved today, and certainly not everything can be solved in one night. I think we've all gotten too used to instant answers because ni miss Google, AI, social media and somewhere along the way we forgot that some things just have a process. And that takes TIME.

And that process looks different for everyone. Maybe I feel lost today and find my way by tomorrow morning. But not everyone moves at that pace, and that applies to you too. There's no deadline on figuring yourself out.

Anyway nag-rant na ko hahahaha.

You know what, Dette, for what it's worth, from where I'm standing, you don't look lost at all. You look like someone finding their way. That's a completely different thing. And I think you know that deep inside you. 🩷

— Gwen 🩷

💔

open when: feeling like breaking down

Okay. Breathe.

I'm not going to tell you to cheer up or look on the bright side right now, because sometimes that advice is annoying and you deserve better than a annoying advice.

So I'll just say: cry if you need to. Scream into the void if you need to. Let it out. There's no version of strength that requires you to hold everything together all the time kay that's not strength, that's just exhaustion with a better PR team. Char, you see what I did there hahahaha.

Actually, Mariaskie, you are allowed to break down. You're allowed to feel like it's too much. You're allowed to be a mess for a moment.

          Because I know for a fact that you'll get back up. You'll pull yourself up because no one will do that for you except yourself. (And this part might sadden you or lift you up but note that it can feel both ways, and it's just how you'll perceive it. Both reactions are valid.)
        

Not because life magically gets easier, but because you are genuinely the kind of person who does. I've seen it. I know it about you even when you forget it about yourself.

You're not broken. You're not any word that tries to shrink you. And if you feel like it right now. Okay, that's yours to feel. You have all the words to describe yourself. But don't force yourself to stay caged in them. I think the yellows and the blues should be fair and equal, and it's up to us to make it that way- even on the days when it isn't.

I know you'll come out the other side of this. And if you're not ready yet, or you just need someone to listen and not talk... send me a voice message and tell me you don't want my opinion. I will just lend you my time, my shoulder, and my ears for as long as you want. 😚

— Gwen 🩷

🏙️

open when: alone in a crowded room

This one's a specific kind of loneliness, and I just want you to know it's one of the most common feelings in the world, and also one of the least talked about. So good job opening this one, actually.

Manila is big and loud and full of people and somehow that makes the loneliness louder, not quieter. G oks.

          But here's what I want to remind you: you have a genuine gift for connecting with people. I noticed it way back in Grade 8 til Senior High, you were just so easy to approach, and you made everyone around you feel comfortable. That didn't disappear when you crossed the bridge to Luzon, ha. That's still you.
        

The right people will find you, or you'll find them. And in the meantime, you don't have to perform okayness in rooms full of strangers. You can just exist. Take up space. Be exactly yourself.

And also call/mesage me if you like. Naa rako diri. Never actually alone ka, mah fren. 🩷

 eh serve rana imong face card mamsh like this

— Gwen 🩷

👑

open when: you feel like a baddie

PERIOD. Because you ARE one and you just needed the reminder, haha!

Okay let's lay down some facts: You packed your life, moved cities, and are out here building something for yourself. That alone is a baddie behavior. Not everyone has that kind of nerve.

          And beyond the big move, you carry yourself well. periodttt. You know who you are. You don't shift and shrink for people. You're consistent, you're real, and you hold yourself accountable in ways that honestly a lot of people don't. and that's not common my fren.
        

So if you opened this letter because you already feel like that girl today? Good. Lean into it. Walk a little taller. Manila doesn't know what hit it yet. hhahha charot the writer is writering

And if you opened it because you needed the push? Consider this your push. Go show up for yourself today like you know exactly what you're worth because you do. as always haha🩷

because you are that gurlll!! 👑

— Gwen 🩷